The Dance of Life: How Two Steps Back Isn’t A Bad Thing

One step forward, two steps back. The journey of life can sometimes feel like an intricate dance. Make a little progress, then things seem to slide back to where they were – to that uncomfortable place. While most people see any backward movement as a failure or at least something not good, let me just say that it’s totally normal.

Healing is a journey, not a destination. If we lived a life without having contact with others, hold up in our homes without any responsibilities to family, employers, and friends, then maybe we wouldn’t have to contend with as much juggling and backwards movement. But probably not. Typically what is responsible for backward movment has less to do with others and more to do with us – our thoughts and our habits.

When we first start making changes – any change – we might start strong, trying new things. But it takes a lot of consistency and repetition to create a new habit. We still are dealing with old ways of thinking and behaving that support our old habits. So we must be on the watch for the old stuff to creep in, catch it, then continue with our new ways of thinking and behaving to counteract it.

The first time we feel ourselves slipping back to old habits is generally where people stop trying, seeing it as proof that the new way won’t work. But this is precisely when we need to continue on with the new stuff, remembering that it is a journey, and that consistent effort is the key to long-lasting success.

So how can you continue stepping forward even slightly after a backslide? Using the dance analogy, I’d say that you just step forward again. If you watch people dance (literally), you’ll likely see that they move forward, backwards, and sideways. If they aren’t moving forward now, they likely will be in just a few beats. And if they move backward, they don’t stop dancing, declaring defeat. Backward movement is part of the dance. Just as it is in life.

Moving backward provides an opportunity to see things from a different perspective. You might find that something (a thought, belief, or action) didn’t work as you expected, so now you know to tweak it a little and see if that changes the direction of your movement.

Here’s some other suggestions on how to navigate the dance of life:

• Remember that it is the culmination of steps that matters. Today it might be two steps back and one forward, and tomorrow might be ten steps forward and one step back. If you are moving forward more than backward, you are headed in the right direction.
• You are moving forward more than you think. We tend to focus on what we don’t like, such as backward slips. We forget to celebrate and honor the forward movement.
• Expect movement in all directions. It is often when we assume that life should always be forward movement when we are most disappointed. But if you go into any new challenge expecting there to be movement in different directions, you will set yourself up for a more realistic picture of what will happen.
• Think of movement in any direction as an opportunity. We learn from everything and movement provides us an opportunity to see what works and what doesn’t.

Looking for more inspiration about navigating the dance of life? Join me for the Get Out of Your Own Damn Way Jam Sessions, where I interview powerful people who have been there, done that, gotten out of their own damn way, and boldly embraced their dream and greatness. Get prepared to be inspired. Join us for FREE at www.krylyn.com/GetOutOfYourWayInterviews.

Photo: IMG_3850 © by Huron Tours & Travel