All posts by Krylyn
Give Me a BRAKE: What Illness Has to Teach Us About Self Care
Sniffle, sniffle, cough, cough, scratchy scratchy sore throat, cough, cough, cough, cough, cough. Ahh, yes, the rhythms and sounds of a viral winter. Forced down time. Rest. Plenty of fluids. And utter boredom. For someone used to going full speed, working long hours, and rarely taking time off, being sick is inconvenient at least – or so I used to think.
As with everything, once I changed my mind about what it means to be sick, something truly amazing happened. I started to see the gift of illness. Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not thrilled with sore throats, congestion, and coughing so hard I see stars. But this resting thing, taking a break from technology, stopping when I’m tired, giving my body and mind a break is something I could get used to.
Our bodies are wonderful storytellers if we just listen. They tell us what they need. Our job is to listen. And sometimes illness is a way for our body to tell us to slow down, take a time-out, and re-group.
If you’re anything like me, you’ll find that illness comes after a stint of burning the candle at both ends, trying to fit 40 hours of work into a 20 hour window of time. It rarely comes when I’ve been taking stellar care of myself. So, for me, illness is just a little reminder that self care is important…always. And especially when I feel like I don’t have time for it.
So I’ll go on enjoying some down time and taking better care of myself, while remembering that once I’m ready to get back into the full swing of things, it’s time to pay closer attention to my body’s signals.
10 Rules for Being Human
Ever wish there was an instruction manual for life laying out the rules of the “game”? Enjoy this short movie and the 10 rules outlined for what it is to be human…from a more spiritual perspective. Which rules do you already live by? Got any other rules to add? Please feel free to comment below.
My favorite among the rules listed in this movie…
There are no mistakes, only lessons
The Matter of Perspective
Remember the telephone game from childhood? In a circle, one person whispers to another person a phrase, and that person then whispers it to the next, and so on until everyone has passed the phrase around. Rarely (if ever) does the original message get through to the last person. There’s typically a variation of the original. This has to do with perspective. How we hear something, which is affected by our filters.
When I work with clients, I often talk about perspective. What we see, hear, think, and feel is filtered through a combination of our past experiences and our beliefs, which color how we see, hear, think, and feel.
Perspective is a powerful thing. When we are able to look at something from another perspective, it allows us to move outside ourselves and our filters and get a different point of view. What may look very clear from one perspective suddenly is not clear or is so different it hardly resembles what we originally thought.
Seeing things from a different perspective allows us to:
- Gain empathy for someone whose life circumstances are different from ours
- Understand others’ opinions as valid, even if different from our own
- See the reasons why someone might do something we wouldn’t do
The old saying “walk a mile in my shoes” speaks to this idea of perspective. If we can get outside ourselves long enough to learn where someone else is coming from, it can go a long way in bridging misunderstandings.
As a pictorial representation of perspective, here are three photos of the same landscape taken in different seasons, courtesy of my dad. What do you notice about this scene in each photo. What is the same? What is different? How would you describe each photo?
I challenge you to take one situation in your life and look at it from someone else’s perspective. Learn what it’s like to look at something and think about it differently. Then take what you learn and choose how to act and how to be. You might be surprised at what happens.
Got CircleSongs
If you’ve been reading my blog, you know about CircleSongs, the improvisational a capella community singing experience created by Grammy Award-Winning artist Bobby McFerrin. Before I went to train with McFerrin in New York in 2011, I came across his album titled “Circle Songs.” These are beautifully crafted improvisational songs by professional singers captured in the recording studio. Some of the singers were also on hand as faculty during the week-long training I attended.
For months, I listened to these songs, waiting and hoping to have an opportunity to train with McFerrin. And when the announcement came, I was one of the first to register.
Listen to these inspirational songs by CircleSong originator and his hand-picked team of singers.
For further information about how you can join a CircleSong group and to listen to samples of CircleSongs I led while studying in New York, please visit http://www.krylyn.com/circlesongs. To register for an upcoming CircleSong group go to http://circlesongs.eventbrite.com.
CircleSong #1
CircleSong #2
CircleSong #3
CircleSong #5
CircleSong #6 – my favorite, btw
CircleSong #8
The Down Side of Self Improvement
It’s that time of year. Just when you think it’s safe to re-enter your life, pack up your holiday decorations, and get back to a sense of normalcy, the New Year’s resolution messages creep in.
Lose weight…get healthy…build your business…fix your relationships…build wealth…make 2013 the BEST YEAR EVER…
I must admit I am a recovering self-help junkie. The lure is intoxicating isn’t it? If only this program, this product, this time will make me happy…It’s seductive. It’s inspiring. It’s marketing. And it may also be what’s keeping you stuck just where you are.
Think about the term self improvement. It implies there’s something wrong, something that needs fixing. If we live our lives based on that belief, then we ride the endless cycle of feeling broken and looking for repair. And most of the time looking for answers (aka things) outside ourselves: books, classes, pills, equipment, gadgets, relationships, etc.
I’m a strong believer that our feelings are a product of our choices, thoughts, attitudes, and beliefs. That things outside of us can’t make us feel, but rather our reaction to those things creates our experiences.
But it’s a fine line between wanting to change and feeling horrible about who we are. And this is the season for people to capitalize on that subtle distinction.
I think there are many products and services out there that can be helpful to us in our journey to change. The trick is picking ones that help rather than hurt us in the process. If messages come at you with a “this is what’s wrong with you” tone, I’d say avoid them altogether. Look for messages that expand on something you’re already doing or wanting that support you and focus on the positive.
What would YOU like to change in 2013? Here’s some things to try as you look ahead to the year and life you want to create:
- Make a list of what you accomplished in 2012. So many times it’s easy to focus on what we DIDN’T do. But be sure to take some time honoring the things you DID do.
- List all the things you are grateful for. Make this a regular practice.
- Spend some time alone in silence or listening to music that is calming. Think of what you want to create for the upcoming year in the areas of health and well being, relationships, career, finance, etc. Then write down one realistic, obtainable goal for each category that you can accomplish within a month.
Remember, wanting to make positive changes and improvements in your life is normal and healthy if it comes from a place of strength. Focus on the positive that’s already in your life and what you want to create and you’ll be off to a great start in making this a wonderful year.
How to Prepare for a CircleSong Group
When I trained with Bobby McFerrin on his CircleSong process, there was a wonderful story he told about preparing for his performances. He talked about how people spend time getting ready for a performance, picking out clothes and basically transforming into a performer. He said a long time ago, he decided that he didn’t need to transform. As an improvisational artist, someone who doesn’t prepare a performance but rather goes on stage and just lets the moment bring him into the experience and the music, he just needs to show up. Every experience from the day leading up to the performance helps shape the performance. So he said he doesn’t change his clothes. He said “the music is in my clothes.”
What a wonderful concept. How often do we think we need to change (our clothes or ourselves) in order to fit the moment? We craft what to say, what to do, how we will present ourselves. But if we just let our natural self come forward, that is all that is truly required.
In improvisational singing, it’s all about the process of allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and open to whatever presents itself. Therefore, preparing for it doesn’t require anything but showing up.
When I lead CircleSongs, I tell people to:
- Expect the unexpected
- Leave their inner critic outside
- Bring an open mind
- Drink plenty of water
The process will take care of itself and lead us to the sounds that create a wonderful, fun, moving, and transformative musical experience.
For further information about how you can join a CircleSong group and to listen to samples of CircleSongs I led while studying in New York, please visit http://www.krylyn.com/circlesongs. To register for an upcoming CircleSong group go to http://circlesongs.eventbrite.com.