Category Archives for In the News
Be Who You Are: Lessons from the Transgendered Community
On the heels of the recent Bruce Jenner interview on 20/20, I feel compelled to speak out about a topic I’m truly passionate about…
Being who you are!
Bruce referenced this phrase multiple times in his interview with Diane Sawyer. He said he is only becoming who he has already been. WOW. If that statement doesn’t make you stop and take pause, I don’t know what will.
Regardless of what you believe about gender identity, I think you can appreciate the gravity of that statement.
Transgender. It’s a topic that has touched my life, both personally and professionally. A good friend of mine transitioned several years ago, becoming the woman she always knew she was. I got to see her journey, from telling the ones she loved most, breaking up with her fiancée at the time, dealing with company policies at her Fortune 500 employer on which bathroom she was allowed to use, surgeries, hormone treatment, therapy, and finding new love.
Having seen my friend’s journey up close and personal, I have MAD RESPECT for anyone going through it. Based on everything they must endure, I’m going to say that people who transition from one gender to another are wicked strong and brave.
Let me say it another way…being who you are is the strongest and bravest thing ANYONE can do. But most of us don’t wear it on the outside for everyone to see like in the transgendered community.
As someone who has worked with clients of different races, religions, sexual orientations and identities over the years, I can tell you that being who you are is a struggle we all share. It just looks different for each of us based on our own stuff.
For some, it’s about gender. For others it’s about abuse, or trauma, or discrimination, or poverty, or religion, etc. The struggle isn’t about the THING we struggle with as much as the process of the struggle, how we are affected by it, and how we overcome it.
But there are so many things that get in the way of us being who we are, aren’t there? Things like:
- The opinions of others
- Thoughts of losing respect and love
- Lack of support and/or understanding
- Fear of rejection, change, and the unknown
These are experiences we ALL have that get in the way, regardless of our gender identity.
As Bruce mentioned in the interview, MOST people do not wake up with a daily struggle with their identity as male or female. But most people DO wake up with struggle, with something they don’t like, with something they are hiding from, running away from, or avoiding. Most people are afraid to be who they really are.
Anyone who is brave enough to stand up and stand out in order to be themselves is amazing in my book. The world needs more people willing to be who they truly are.
So my questions for you are:
- Who are you?
- What are you willing to do to be who you are?
Leave your comments below. I’d love to hear them.
Lessons from Connecticut’s Recent Tragedy
In light of recent events, I wanted to take a moment to say how deeply saddened I am by all the loss, tragedy, and fear kicked up in Connecticut this past Friday, 12/14/12. While the press seems always focused on “why,” I’d like to just point out there is never a good reason. No good reason to drive a young man to think that killing others and himself is the way. No good reason why innocent lives are lost and others are forever changed by traumatic experience.
The debates have started about gun control and mental health services yet again…an all too frequent discussion in the aftermath of so many of these types of events in recent history. It is easy to get swept up in fear and in judgment.
But the real challenge is continuing on, learning from what happened, and supporting those affected by it, including ourselves. Instead of focusing on why, we must focus on what. What have you learned from this as far as how you want to be treated and how you want others to be treated? What can you do to take good care of yourself and others right now?
In the darkest of experiences, I believe there is always a lesson to learn. What will that lesson be for you? Feel free to leave a comment below.
Photo: rainbow © by paparutzi
Finding “The Greatest Love of All” – Thank You, Whitney!
When someone who has had a profound impact on our lives suddenly leaves us, it strikes a chord. I, as many of you, am deeply saddened by the news of Whitney Houston’s death.
Maybe it’s because I remember seeing her very first video as a MTV world premier back in the 80’s, knowing I was hearing the beginning of something (and someone) very special. Or maybe it’s the uplifting, positive music she sang that inspired me as a teenager and young adult (“Greatest Love of All,” “I’m Every Woman,” etc.). And maybe it’s because our children are about the same age. Of course it could be a combination of these things that give me pause to remember her great talent and be reminded that we all (including you and me) have a special gift to share with the world. Our job is simply to share it…before it’s too late.
But so often we get in our own way, don’t we? Today, I invite you to take a moment, reflect on your special gift, and think of one thing you can do to get it out into the world TODAY. It doesn’t have to be a huge step. For some great ideas on HOW to do just that, check out these articles:
Enjoy some of my favorite songs by Ms. Houston that so eloquently highlight the same positive messages I often tell my self (and my clients). Thank you, Ms. Houston. Your legacy of inspiration and hope lives on…