What At-Risk Youth Have to Teach Us About Life

The most profound changes often come from the smallest of shifts in our perspective. This is a belief I find myself coming back to again and again, especially when evidence mounts to support it.

Recently, I spent two weeks volunteering with at-risk youth at Theater Camp through Free Arts of Arizona. The camp helps abused and neglected youth living in groups homes, shelters, and treatment facilities tell their stories through the creative arts (acting, spoken word poetry, dance/movement, visual arts, and music).

Having just gone through a major re-brand in my business, I was ready for a break. Things didn’t go as planned and instead of spending more time troubleshooting technical issues and living in the space of uncertainty, I was so grateful to get away. I knew the time focusing on other things would help shift my perspective, and I was right.

I also believe that there are lessons everywhere. Lessons to help us remember. Lessons to help us regain our perspective on what truly matters. Here are just some of the lessons I learned (and re-learned) by stepping away from my daily routine and being of service to some amazing young folks:

1. We all want to be seen for who we truly are. These kids had some poignant stories to share about what they’ve been through – sexual abuse, gang violence, parents dying naturally or being murdered, physical abuse, drug and alcohol abuse, etc. Even some of us who didn’t grow up in “the system” have similar stories to share. But we are NOT our stories. We are survivors. We all want to love and be loved. We all want to be accepted.

2. We all have a voice – and that voice matters. In a discussion early on in Theater Camp, the kids talked about wanting to have a voice in what happens to them. They are sometimes left out of important talks that affect where they live and with whom. While there are decisions to be made from a bigger picture perspective, no one’s voice should ever be excluded from the conversation. That goes in your life too. Just because your voice may not be the final say, it still deserves to be heard. Your voice matters, especially when it comes to your life. Speak up. Be heard.

3. We all want to be part of something. Many of these kids said they wanted to be part of a family. Some turned to gangs or drugs or self- harm behaviors (like cutting themselves) to escape the pain of NOT feeling like they belonged. There is a basic human need to feel like part of a bigger whole – a community or family. These kids found that type of support at Theater Camp and were able to thrive because of it. Sometimes the people you are born to are NOT the healthiest. But that doesn’t mean you cannot create your own community or family. We all need that kind of support to help us grow and thrive.

4. We all need encouragement and support. So many of these kids wanted to quit and give up. Some walked out of rehearsals or froze or said they weren’t going to get on stage. They were afraid. Can you relate to wanting to give up due to fear? I sure can. But what amazed me is that just a few words of encouragement, a chat about how fear is a GOOD THING because it tells you that what you are doing is really important, and some rallying made all the difference. These kids (who often have been disappointed numerous times by several adults in their lives) KNEW that me and the other adults there had their backs. We were there to support them through the fear and celebrate with them when they moved through it. I cannot stress this point enough – you can do great things with the right support behind you.

5. We must be vulnerable in order to grow. Vulnerability is scary. There’s no way around it. In order to get past hurt, pain, fear, anxiety, etc., we must feel it and move through it. And the only way to do that is to be vulnerable. Showing our vulnerability to others is healing not only for us, but for those witnessing it. This was Theater Camp. The kids who were brave and shared their stories inspired the kids who didn’t. The audiences who came to the final performances were invited to share how they were affected. Many stood up in tears, stating how they could personally relate to the kids on stage or how those stories touched them deeply. Some would tell you that vulnerability is weakness, but I challenge that. If you have ever witnessed anyone sharing their pain, you know how much courage it takes to do that. We open ourselves up in such a beautiful way by doing that. And it’s my honor to witness people doing that – not only these kids but also my clients.

I’m sure there are other lessons in the Theater Camp experience, and perhaps I’ll write more about them when they surface. For now, I’m honored to have been a witness to these young folks on their journey to healing. Their bravery has impacted me and everyone else who worked with them and who came to their performances. And they have helped remind us all some very important life lessons.

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